At a moment like this, I can't help but wonder: what would Jimmy Buffett do?

I am on a crusade. (As an attendee of UIW when they were the Crusaders, before they caved to a more "p.c." mascot, I figure I'm allowed--and what is wrong with a school founded on religious principles having a religious-related mascot? They're now the Cardinals (possibly even the color--like Stanford), or some other innocuous thing; they didn't even have the cojones to become the Chili Peppers for goodness sake. Bollocks! I say, but I digress....)

I am on a crusade. At lunch today, I was reminded of the need. I went to Taco Bell today, where I haven't eaten in a long time (maybe 6 months--it made the "Ahhh... we meet again" salsa pack [above] that I got very fitting). After ordering, I went to the fountain drinks, and, surprisingly, they had Dr Pepper as an option. So, I proceed to fill up my cup with the "Dr Pepper". When I took my first sip, I knew I'd been boondoogled: it was root beer.

I wasn't terribly surprised. For some reason unknown to the physical reality of the universe--most likely because most of the population here hasn't actually tasted the wonderfulness that is DP--the prevailing notion in South Florida is that root beer is the equivalent or next-best-thing to Dr Pepper. In fact, my crusade to educate the locals here on this fact started after several offerings of root beer in appeasement for not having Dr Pepper: the wait staff not realizing that your typical Pepper generally prefers Cherry Coke or Coke as their alternative drink (I'm getting a Family Feud vibe here). Root beer's gonna be way down there, somewhere (out of the top-4 answers on the board, earning your team a big red X), and most likely the option the connoiseur will choose only if the place has Pepsi without its Wild Cherry variant.

So... I'm on a crusade: educate Floridians that Dr Pepper is not root beer; it's not even close (see one's colorful, the others just normal-colored text--that proves it!). Just because the PTBs at your fountain put the RB where the DP was (not realizing the catastrophe that is dropping DP as an option) doesn't mean it's the same--capiche? "I'm a Pepper, you're a Pepper, wouldn't you like to be a Pepper too" does not apply to root beer: it's not invited (no matter how envious it might be).

Just say no to confusing the two:
Dr Pepper ≠ root beer
(make it a mantra, if you like)

We now return you to you regularly schedule program, already in progress... (and I should finish learning All About Eve)
hasta :)


I could pay off my tab
Pour myself in a cab
And be back to work before 2